No regrets

I do not regret having the best BBQ of my life at the The Pig in Memphis. I don't regret all the beignets at the Café du Monde. I don't regret the mufuletta or the red beans and rice. I don't regret ordering iced tea so sweet you could stand a spoon up in it every day for a week. I don't regret the chips and candy road food. Furthermore, I don't regret not getting up to exercise because I've been staying up late with my husband watching True Blood, drinking red wine, and eating brown sugar ice cream.

So, I guess I can't regret that this morning I weighed 134.6 pounds.

Knee trouble

My knees have been bothering me for over a year. Writing that down it seems crazy that I waited so long to see a doctor. I spent a lot of time thinking it'd get better when I lost a little more weight. Then I thought I was just getting old. Gillian helped me get good shoes for running and told me how to stretch properly, but still my knees hurt. At first only when I was running, but then more and more often going up stairs, and then most recently my left knee started hurting whenever I use the clutch in my car and sometimes when I'm not doing anything at all. I thought taking a whole month off exercise might fix the problem, but no.

I finally went to see my doctor, who diagnosed it as Patella Femoral Syndrome. This is a pretty vague "knee pain" diagnosis, she referred me to a physical therapist to get a better idea of what's going on.

I saw the physical therapist yesterday and the problem seems to be that my hips are both too tight and too weak. My knees can go out of alignment because the hip muscles aren't holding them in place securely enough, and also the tight IT band across my left hip is pulling on my left kneecap. I have stretches and exercises to do twice a day and physical therapy for six weeks. The therapist seemed to really know what she was doing, so I'm hopeful that this is going to work.

Track-O-Rama

This week I've tracked almost everything I've eaten, which in some kind of way that I'm sure can be classified as OCD, makes me feel all warm and fuzzy inside. Also I'm sticking with mostly plants and meat, with a bit of dairy thrown in for good measure. The exception is breakfast - that meal will continue to be oatmeal until I buy a nonstick pan to make omelettes. (I'm pretty sure both Ken & I are now at high-risk for Alzheimer's given the state of the pan we currently have.)

God knows what's in store for us in Brazil in terms of eating, but apparently there's a lot more fresh fruit, and Ken is already teaching me how to order the chicken & pineapple sandwich (in Portuguese, natch).

Oh, and I made this crazy promise to myself to work out every day in June. So far I'm 4/4, and leaving for the gym as soon as I post this!

Reality Bites

I'm still here, and I obviously need to be here more than ever.

This morning when I went to the gym, Adrián made me get on the scale, even though I broke out in hives and a cold sweat as soon as we got near it.

It turns out eating more veggies doesn't work so well if you slather said veggies in dulce de leche.

"Last time," Adrián announced, pointing at the 71kg mark, "you were here." He slid the weight across the top of the scale and I waited very impatiently for it to level off. 72. 73. Nothing. Finally the scale was level, at 74 kilos.

SEVENTY FOUR KILOS, which means I have gained 3 kilos, or 6.6 lbs, since we arrived in the land of meat and alfajores. Which also means I have to get back into the 150s before I can even think about the 140s.

My Five Stages of Weight Gain:

1. PANIC: Oh shit oh shit oh shit.
2. DISGUST: Argh.
3. DESPAIR: In three weeks I'm going to be a fat 35-year-old.
4. DESPERATION: How little can I eat for the next three weeks?
5. HOPE: Could any of that be muscle?
6. OPTIMISM: At least it wasn't 5 kilos!

I'd bargain (there's always anorexia and bulimia!) but I love food and hate throwing up, so unfortunately those are out. I definitely haven't been walking much around here lately (especially since Spanish classes come to us now) and with the weather getting colder (oh hello, Southern Hemisphere) I just want to sit around in track pants eating cookies. Instead, I'm going to try Sparkpeople for a few weeks to track what I'm eating, and hopefully add a couple more stages to the list:

6. ACCEPTANCE: It's all a project.
7. HOTBODY: 'Nuff said.

Back on track, over and over again

I found out that the bright side of stress and insomnia for me is weight loss. I spent a month not exercising and freaking out about papers and projects and finals and my weight went to 127. Then I turned in the last paper and my appetite came flooding back and I gained 5 pounds in 2 weeks. We took a trip to Chicago and ate lots of deep dish pizza and cheesecake so I'm sure that didn't help. I'm back at 132 and trying to focus again on healthy and sustainable.

You all around?

Ideal body

I've been thinking a lot lately about goals. I never imagined I'd be a size six, but still I'm dissatisfied with my body. Much more so than I was at size sixteen. Objectively I look pretty fit, but there are still parts that are squishy and I still don't have much visible definition in my arms. I'm not sure what to do now, though. It seems almost disordered to want to be a size four?

Skwigg is a fitness blogger I love and she just had a great post about her changing definition of an ideal body.

G's Weigh-in: 71kg

71kg is not bad considering that I've eaten pretty much whatever I wanted and gone to the gym twice in the past three weeks. Note that "pretty much whatever I wanted" includes but is not limited to: ice cream, empanadas, provoleta, and lots of beer and steak. Not to mention vino tinto. ¡Dios mío!

I started working out with a trainer yesterday. We're going to meet 3x/week for the month of April at least. Then I'll make a call on whether to train for the Buenos Aires marathon in October!